Mindfully Depressed: Rituals That Get Me Through Seasonal Depression
And learning to cope when the sun goes down
The days have grown darker. The nights are getting colder. My eyes feel heavier from sleepless nights filled with anxiety, racing thoughts, overwhelming busyness, and the familiar sadness that winter brings.
While everyone finds the energy to decorate their Christmas trees, I struggle to wash even one load of laundry. Winter has always been cruel to me, and each year, I try to befriend the cold—to make peace with the darkness that seems so eager to steal away the sun.
It occurred to me this morning that I have not been outside since Tuesday, and though that is not a long time for some, that is a long time for my skin not to have been brushed by fresh air. I took myself on a walk, and silly me, I was not prepared for the ferocious winds, and after ten minutes, I had to turn back. Next time, I will be wearing a hat, scarf, and gloves instead of persuading myself into believing it's not really that cold out.
The fact is, it's cold outside, and it's that time of the year when depression kicks in for me and many. I may be a therapist, but I am not above dark days. Degrees and clinical training doesn't stop life from life-ing (I know, I made that word up, but you get what I mean).
So—I'm writing this for those who, like me, are starting to feel sadness wrap around them like an oversized sweater on a small child. While I don't have any new tricks up my sleeve this season, I do have my trusted rituals that keep me going when the days feel dark and heavy. I'm sharing these go-to practices, hoping they might inspire you.
My Winter Rituals
morning and evening journaling (I use the five-minute journal)
morning and evening prayer and devotional reading
morning coffee, and evening tea (apple cinnamon or rooibos, to be exact)
re-watching Insecure, Girlfriends, or Grace & Frankie (Joan is so damn neurotic, Issa is funny AF, and if I had an alter ego, it would be Frankie)
music—lots of it: right now, I am rotating between Ariana Grande, Ravyn Lenae, and St. Beauty
audiobooks: currently listening to Lessons in Chemistry (and I am very annoyed at the fact that they gave six-thirty a perspective, because… why?)
cooking nourishing meals: lots of root veggies and chicken breast in particular
lots of writing—playful, serious, humorous writing
speaking of humor—lots of humor. find someone to make jokes with
ditching WFH to work at the coffee shop: and ordering one pump of lavender to add to my coffee
walking—lots of walking. I'll walk for 90 minutes straight while listening to my book
gym session 2x a week—lifting heavy weights because sad girls need to lift heavy
lots of co-regulation: I like being around people. more of this, please!
less time scrolling on social media: am I the only one who's noticing that everyone online is either talking about the same thing or doing the same thing? has social media turned into the Twilight Zone?
cuddling with my dog: humans don't deserve dogs—they are angels.
sliding into my friends' DMs, sending them recipes that I hope they will cook for me, memes that reflect our friendship, and restaurants we need to add to the queue for our next hang out
spending less money shopping—because seriously, I'm slightly depressed, so where am I even going? j.k.
opening the blinds—let the sunshine in, love.
saying yes to outings—depressed but motivated.
moving at a slower pace—as long as I still have clean underwear, the laundry will get done when it gets done.
planning my next escape—did someone say vacation?
There's more, but that covers most of it for now. I also share additional tools in episode 36 of my podcast Mindful With Minaa, and I discuss managing financial stress during the holidays in episode 38—because who wants to be depressed and broke?
That's all for today. Wishing you well. I hope you found this list of rituals helpful. Please share what has worked for you in the comments.
I felt the same way about six-thirty and it took me time to adjust with that narration, i then didnt mind it so much. I didnt like the series, the book is really good!
I hope the cold days get better for you. December is usually a month I look forward to all year, july is when I feel a bit too anxious and unwelcomed somehow.
thank you for sharing your experience :)
Thanks for all the ideas in wintertime self-care and regulation. Six-thirty was my very favorite part of Lessons in Chemistry! You may enjoy the TV show better than the book since they totally deprive us of most of the quality six-thirty perspective ;)