Moving on from Friends: How to Handle the Inevitable ‘Parting of Ways’

Friendship Breakups Are Hard And We Should Talk About That More

When I was in college, I had a group of girlfriends who were kind of like my real-time version of “Sex and The City.” We did almost everything together. We went to concerts, shows, brunches, and celebrated each other’s milestones with love, laughter, and a deep recognition for how important each of us were to each other. 

When it was time for me to graduate college, the other ladies in the group were adjusting to new changes as well. One decided to move back home to Chicago. Another took on a new role at a very demanding job, and another was battling anticipatory grief related to a sick parent. With all these changes, our friendship circle started to fade until the friendship finally dissipated.

Photo by Jamie Hagan on Unsplash

Navigating the Emotional Ups & Downs of Friendship Loss

Similar to a separation from a significant other - or for some, even worse than that - a friendship breakup often leads us through a rollercoaster of emotions. Whether you were the one who ended a friendship intentionally or you and a long-time best friend gradually parted ways, feelings of loneliness, guilt, sadness, regret, and anger are normal parts of grieving the loss of a friendship. 

For many of us, losing a friend can even trigger old wounds of neglect and abandonment that stem from childhood and blaming ourselves for not “being good enough” to hold onto a friendship.